baby crying info - how to
decipher your baby's crying
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Listening to
your baby cry and cry and not
knowing what to do can try the
patience of a saint. During the
first few weeks of life, most
infants spend increasing amounts
of time crying. At six weeks of
age, for example, crying time
tends to peak at about 2.75
hours a day, nearly 30 percent
of a baby's waking time. This
amount of crying comes as a
shock to first-time parents, who
are often devastated by having
to cope with it all day, every
day. Most of an infant's crying
occurs in the late afternoon and
early evening. By 12 weeks of
age, babies are apt to return to
the more bearable one hour a day
of crying they exhibited at one
week of age.
Read on to
learn more about what your
baby's different cries mean and
how you can soothe them.
Babies use
different types of cries to
express their needs. Learning to
read a baby's cries is a skill
that all parents should acquire
in order to respond effectively
to the child's needs.
HUNGER
Hunger is the most common cause
of crying. Babies say "I'm
hungry" with a low-pitched,
rhythmic cry that repeats a
pattern of short cry, brief
pause, short cry, pause. The
sound is less shrill than other
cries, and sounds demanding
rather than desperate. This cry
is often preceded by finger
sucking, lip smacking or
nudging.
TIREDNESS
The fatigue cry is a wailing
sound with a definite vibrato.
This cry gradually builds up in
intensity and often has a
continuous and nasal quality.
BOREDOM
Babies say "I'm lonely and
bored" with a cry that is
whiny and whimpering; sometimes
it almost sounds like a moan.
This cry stops abruptly when the
infant is picked up.
PAIN
This cry begins suddenly and is
high-pitched and shrill. The cry
is loud and long (as long as
four seconds), which leaves the
infant breathless. This cry is
followed by a dramatic, lengthy
pause (as long as seven seconds)
as the baby catches her breath
again. The baby's arms and legs
may flail and then jerk tensely
back into the body. This cry is
nonstop and uncontrollable.
ILLNESS
Sick babies signal their
discomfort with a prolonged cry.
The cry sounds weak, whiny and
nasal. It is generally lower in
pitch than a pain cry. The cry
can more readily be identified
as a signal of illness when it
is considered together with
changes in the baby's appearance
and behavior. The baby may have
a flushed face, appear listless,
refuse to eat, have diarrhea and
avoid cuddling.
COLIC
Colic crying is readily
identifiable because it
generally occurs like clockwork
every afternoon or evening,
lasts for several hours each
time, and the baby is not
readily consolable.
IRRITABILITY
Irritable babies cry on and off
all day long and often wake
crying during the night, as
well. Soothing techniques work
better with these babies than
with colicky infants.
Babies
sometimes cry for no apparent
reason. After you've checked to
see that your baby is not tired,
sick, hungry or in pain, you'll
want to try some of these common
soothing strategies. When you
do, remember these general
guidelines:
•When your
baby cries, go to him as soon as
you can. A baby who gets
"worked up" or
hysterical is much harder to
soothe.
•Try one of
the following soothing
techniques for about 10 minutes.
If unsuccessful, try another for
10 more minutes. Keep this up
until either your baby becomes
calm or you feel as if you need
a break. Then it's time to find
someone else to calm your baby
or for you to let the baby cry
it out. You must know your
breaking point so you can avoid
acting out your feelings of
resentment, frustration and
hostility.
TECHNIQUES
While there is no single or sure
way to stop a baby from crying,
the following interventions have
been found to have a much higher
success rate than other
approaches.
CARRYING:
Studies indicate that babies who
are carried by a parent in his
or her arms or in a carrier for
at least three hours during the
day cry less than infants who
aren't carried as much. The
warmth and close physical
proximity during carrying is
calming to your baby and enables
you to respond quickly to his
cries.
RHYTHMIC
MOTION: Many babies stop crying
when in motion. Rocking chairs,
infant swings, carriage rides,
car rides and dancing
chest-to-cheek across the floor
are all comforting motions. Some
experts believe that these
repetitive, rhythmic movements
satisfy a baby's need for
predictability. Being able to
rely on what comes next--that a
chair will rock forward after it
rocks backward--seems to help a
baby feel more secure and safe.
SWADDLING: In
the womb, babies grow accustomed
to the constant feeling of
snugness and something enclosing
them, a sensation they lose at
birth when they're thrust into
the wide-open air.
Swaddling--being wrapped very
tightly in a lightweight
blanket--can restore this safe
feeling, and it also prevents
arms and legs from flailing
about, which can be startling
and upsetting to newborns.
To swaddle at
home, take one corner of a
receiving blanket and fold it
down six inches. Place the baby
on the blanket with her head
above the fold. Next, take one
side of the blanket and draw it
across the baby's body. Fold the
bottom section up over the
baby's feet, then fold the last
section across the body.
Finally, turn the swaddled baby
onto her stomach. A few weeks
after birth infants may cry
harder after swaddling because
they find this confining rather
than comforting.
SOOTHING
SOUND: Babies are comforted by
rhythmic, repetitive sounds that
remind them of things they heard
in the womb: sounds of the ocean
or a waterfall, the hum of a
laundry washer or dryer, the
sound of a heartbeat or the hum
of a vacuum cleaner. Babies also
like slow, lilting music and the
soft sound of a parent's voice
crooning a lullaby.
COMFORT
SUCKING: Babies have a strong
sucking urge that is not related
to their desire for food. Their
crying is often controlled by
sucking on their fingers or fist
or a pacifier. Follow these
time-tested tips for successful
pacifier use: Give your baby a
pacifier before she reaches a
screaming pitch, and to avoid
tooth decay, don't sweeten the
nipple with honey. Try to wean
your baby off the pacifier by
six months of age--a time when
the urgent sucking need is
diminished. For young babies, up
until about six months of age,
there is no need to worry about
bad habits forming from too much
sucking. On the contrary,
providing opportunities for
non-nutritive sucking for as
long as a young baby wants can
reduce crying and help the
infant settle easier at sleep
time.
MASSAGE: Touch
is one of a baby's most highly
developed senses at birth.
Stroking your infant's skin can
calm the baby and help her sleep
better. A good habit is to
massage your baby from head to
toe for 15 minutes once daily
before bed or at bath time.
Simply pour a little baby oil
into the palms of your hands,
rub them together; then using
your fingertips, draw circles in
a rhythmic motion over your
baby's body. Don't forget his
hands, feet, face and head.
Next, hold an arm or leg, and
gripping softly with your open
hand, gently move it back and
forth using long, slow strokes.
Be sure to
apply just enough gentle
pressure so that you don't
tickle. Observe your baby for
cues about whether she likes
being touched. If she doesn't
like the sensation, she'll fuss,
arch her back, breathe harder
and turn redder. Chances are,
though, she'll enjoy the loving
massage. Apart from enjoyment,
stroking the infant's skin sends
messages to the brain to
increase levels of beneficial
hormones and chemicals,
including those that help the
baby absorb food, bear pain and
regulate levels of cortisol, a
stress hormone.
CUDDLIES: Many
babies love nestling with
something soft like Mom's
nightgown, a soft blanket or a
plush toy. Typically, they don't
begin to grow attached to an
object like this and actively
seek it out until around eight
months. Prior to this age, keep
a soft object next your baby
when you cuddle with her, so
she'll associate the object with
your loving touch.
ROUTINES: A
repetitive, predictable pattern
of care may be more comforting
to your baby than any single
soothing technique. As soon as
you bring your baby home,
establish a few simple routines,
like bathing at the same time
each day or hearing the same
lullaby before bedtime each
night. Being able to count on
some things day in and day out
is consoling to an infant who is
exposed to so many new things
the first year.
RELIEF HELP:
Constant crying is bound to make
you feel tense and upset. These
negative feelings are likely to
be picked up by your baby who
will cry all the more. You may
be surprised when your spouse, a
friend or a grandmother cradles
your "inconsolable"
baby and magically calms the
screams. After a break you'll
feel calmer, more refreshed and
better able to respond to your
baby.
CRY IT OUT:
Babies sometimes need to cry out
inner feelings of fatigue or
tension at sleep time. This can
be a self-soothing activity for
the infant. So, if external
soothing techniques prove
ineffective or overly
stimulating, consider whether
your baby just needs to cry for
a brief spell by herself to
release tension and settle down.
Charles E. Schaefer, Ph.D.,
is a professor of psychology and
director of the Crying Baby
Clinic at Fairleigh Dickinson
University. He is the author of
more than 40 books, including RAISING
BABY RIGHT and HOW TO
HELP CHILDREN WITH COMMON
PROBLEMS.